Maintaining emotional balance can be extremely challenging, especially during times of crisis, trauma or major change. As humans, we tend to stick with what we know even when the results are less than satisfactory. Have you observed people (or perhaps yourself) continuing to repeat the same behavior patterns while expecting different results?

Life happens. Events take place that are beyond our control, and some of them can be extremely upsetting and all-consuming. We can't avoid negative situations, nor can we change the behavior or opinions of other people involved. We can only look honestly at our own reactions and try to channel our responses into a positive direction.

Emotional balance is achieved through identifying, feeling and processing our emotional reactions in appropriate and healthy ways.

If you are struggling to accept and adjust to an emotional challenge, here are some strategies to re-shape your reactions and find relief.

1. Briefly summarize the situation. Try to state what's happened as simply and unemotionally as possible, using concise and neutral language. Reducing your problem to its simplest form is a great way of making it seem smaller and more manageable.

For example, your mind may be screaming: "I can't believe she betrayed my trust! Why would she blab something I told her in strict confidence? She promised she wouldn't tell anyone. Now everyone is going to know! I'll never trust her again."

A simpler, calmer description would be: "I shared a secret with a friend who told it to someone else."

Restating the problem succinctly and neutrally takes away a lot of its drama and power. It also makes the situation seem less personal and unique. Lots of people fail to keep secrets and the world keeps turning. You can survive this.

2. Describe your current reaction to your challenge. How do you truly feel at this moment? Don't hold back. Are you angry, fearful, regretful, anxious, overwhelmed, defeated, resentful, or agitated? Get in touch with your true feelings. Acknowledge them; they belong to you and they are real.

3. Create a rating system (numbers, stars, plus signs, exclamation marks, etc.) and evaluate the intensity of your reaction. This is a form of validation and a way to judge where you are along the path of emotional healing.

4. Envision your desired emotional reaction. What's your concept of a healthy and appropriate response? How do you want to handle this situation? What kind of genuine reaction would make you feel like you handled yourself with dignity, fairness and grace?

5. Think about actions you can take to move closer to your desired reaction. For example, you may think you owe someone an apology, even though you might not be ready to make it at this time.

Look at what role you played in creating the current situation. Do you need to change your attitude or perspective? Make the situation less personal or important? Or do you need to simply do nothing until a desirable course of action becomes clearer?

You may need to repeat these steps a number of times before you experience a calmer, more serene response. Keeping a journal may help you gain insight and see progress. Hopefully, with repetition and persistence you will streamline your path towards peace and emotional balance.